It's Complicated!

I saw a friend's status on Facebook the other day stating that he was 'single' and 'it's complicated'.

Hm...

I was tempted to see his 'single' status, raise it to 'married' and call his 'it's complicated' with a hearth 'HA! I LIVE complicated relationships every day!'

I'm a husband. I'm a father. I'm a son (all three of THOSE to people I share a house with!) I'm a father-in-law. I'm a brother. I'm a son-in-law. I'm a brother-in-law. I'm a...Well, you get the point.

I am MARRIED to a fantastic, smart, gorgeous, funny and...surprise...COMPLICATED woman!
We do not share the same brain (thank God above she doesn't have mine...she would have driven herself off a cliff years ago!). We do not share the same body. We do not share the same opinions. We do not share the same temperament. SINCE we do no share those and many other things, we find ourselves either at odds with each other or trying awkwardly to arrange our psyches' to 'fit' into the others ideas or view points on some situation so as to live in as much harmony as possible.

I found the previous sentence complicated just to write!

We DO have one character trait in common...we are both selfish, and we want our own way. It is my considered opinion that everyone in this world shares that trait with us. And since this is the case, I would most definitely define our relationship as 'complicated'.

I am a FATHER of COMPLICATED children!

I have three exceptional children, and one incredible daughter-in-law. They all bring me much joy, happiness, satisfaction, mile of smiles and great pride! They also bring me great frustration, confusion, sadness, grey hairs and anger. They also have that whole selfish thing going on as well, so add that generously to the mix! Since these, and other traits and emotions are often played against and with each other, I would most definitely define my relationship with them as 'complicated'.

Now, I realize what my friend was saying with his status. He had had a sudden or unexpected change in his relationship. I may, or may not, have been of his own choosing, and where he could explain it, it was more than he wanted to share with the general public, so he wrapped it up in a simple 'it's complicated'. I understand.

But we ALL live complicated lives (again...surprise!)

God seems to understand too. In the book of John, Jesus tells us that 'Here on Earth you WILL have many trials and sorrows' (16:33, emphasis mine). With all due love and respect toward my family and friends, many of my trials and sorrows come by way of them. And, many more times, THEIR trials and sorrows come by way of my! The people I share a house with can attest to that! I, they, we...make life complicated!

But, if you know the rest of the verse, you know that Jesus says, 'but take heart, because I have overcome the world.' We all have a way to get through the 'complicated'. It's tied to that verse in Philippians that says 'we can do ALL things through Christ who gives us strength' (4:13).

A complicated life is pretty much a given during our allotted time to spin on the Earth. Accepting it, dealing with it, moving on with it...will, quite honestly, make it less complicated, in my opinion. Not any less frustrating or difficult at times...just less complicated.

Romans 8:18 says, that AFTER this complicated life is over, it will prove to be 'nothing compared to the glory HE will reveal to us later'. A note I made in my Bible next to this verse says 'we won't even THINK 'it was worth it'...because this complicated life won't even be a blip on the radar in heaven.'

THAT's pretty cool...very simple...not complicated!

Mark

REAL Updates!

On occasion as I handle my sound duties at church, or as I'm preparing during the week, I'll think about the songs we're singing that Sunday. Imagine that? Actually considering the words to the praise songs that are being sung to God! Usually I find myself too busy to deal in such trivial matters (!) but every once in a while it'll happen.

Anyway, I've always loved the song 'Blessed Be Your Name.' I'm sure most of you have either heard it or sung it. Great style and rhythm, starts lite, builds to a crescendo, then a strong finish! Finely crafted song! But let's do a word study for a few moments....

"Blessed be Your name,

In a land that is plentiful,

Where Your streams of abundance flow,

Blessed be Your name."

I love those Facebook updates where people are talking about some aspect of their life at that moment and how blessed they are.
“Sitting on the porch with my husband, watching the sunset. I’m blessed.”

“Watching my kids play in the park and my youngest runs up and gives me a hug and tells me he loves me. I’m blessed!”

“Playing games with family and friends. I’m blessed!”

And on and on. We’ve all seen them, and we would definitely agree…those are blessed times.Your health is good. Your family is running smoothly. Maybe you’re pregnant and the future is looking rosy. Your bank account isn't suffering, your house has just sold for more than you asked…Utopia! Nirvana (not the singing group!)! Nay, 'Heavenly!'

"Every blessing you pour out I'll turn back to praise!"
Great stuff!

But...the song doesn't end there, does it? Dang it!!There is a second part of the verse.

'Blessed be Your name,

When I'm found in the desert place,

When I walk through the wilderness,

Blessed be Your name.'

Hmmm…

Job said in his book in chapter 1 and verse 22, "The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord." And from OUR point of view (not being in the middle of his problems), we can definitely agree. “Doesn’t matter what’s happening, Job. Continue to bless God’s name! You hang in there. Don’t lose the faith! Semper fi, my brother!” We have the safety of being the posterity that his story was written for.

And when we sing the song, I don't doubt that a part of us actually means the words. We are deeply committed to praising and blessing God even in the hard times…as long as they’re not THAT hard! As long as they don’t severely rock us off the comfortable road we’re on. We might even sing the song loudly, maybe raise our hands, our hearts and souls filled with love for God and His will, whatever it might be.

But it's safe in there.

It's church.

But if we want to be …real…be the type of Christian and follower of God that Job was…well, try these ‘updates’ on for size…
“The bump the doctor removed from our child's neck came back from pathology, and he wants to talk with us. He didn’t sound encouraged. But, we’re blessed!”

“The house sale fell through. We’re back to square one! But we’re blessed!”

“I’m headed to the lawyer’s office to sign the final divorce papers. I really don’t want this…but God is still on the throne!”

Or these phone calls you get on an idle Tuesday…

Your wife is at the obstetrician and she's crying, and not in a happy way...

Your boss calls you in unexpectedly and asks you to shut the door...

The police have found your child at the wrong place doing the wrong thing...

Job’s entries might read something like this…
“Just got word that all my animals have been stolen and the ranch hands killed. Be praying for me and their families. I don’t know what I’m going to do. But, God’s name be blessed.”

“A tornado destroyed my son’s house. All my kids and their families were there. None survived. My wife and I can barely breath. I don’t understand and I want to curse God...but He has a reason. I will still bless His name.”

"When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I'm gonna say,

Blessed be the name of the Lord"

Paul said in 2 Corinthians 4, talking about the power of God in us, starting in verse 8, "We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing; persecuted, but NOT FORSAKEN; struck down, but not destroyed...

"Jesus Himself said in John 16:33, "In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world." He was giving us His peace!

The song ends with these word over and over...

"Blessed be the name of the Lord,

Blessed be Your name.

Blessed be the name of the Lord,

Blessed be Your Glorious name."

That’s an update we can all post!

The Wedding Laugh

A year ago I made people laugh. Fortunately, it wasn’t JUST a year ago I made people laugh. I’ve been doing it ever since, quite successfully some would say (ok, ‘some’ means ‘me’). Granted, it usually falls in the ‘unintentional comedy’ area, and it mostly involves my family laughing at something idiotic I’ve done, but hey…a laugh’s a laugh!

Anyway, a year ago on June 20, my son, Reese, married an incredibly wonderful, beautiful, way-over-his-head young lady named Melanie. Reese did me the incredible and totally unexpected honor of selecting me to be his best man. The rehearsal, ceremony, and reception went off very well…the message by the pastor, the welcome and prayer at the reception, the DJ…all fell into line quite nicely.

Then came time for toasting the happy couple...the maid of honor did her thing…and I was given the microphone…and decided to ‘wing it’.

For those who weren’t there…you sense it coming, don’t you? One of those ‘I can see the train wreck about to happen and there’s nothing I can do about it so I’ll just sit back and watch’. For those who were there, and remember what I said…try to keep your snickering to just that, please!

After Melanie’s maid of honor, Sarah, gave her toast (done very well…had a script and everything!), it was my turn. I have to say, I started well. It did sound promising…something about ‘make each other laugh’, ‘keep laughter and fun in your marriage’, etc, etc. Nothing bad or embarrassing. Yet.

One of the many problems I deal with on a daily basis (and Noelle and the kids suffer BECAUSE of it as well) is mush mouth. I mumble my words sometimes; let my mouth get ahead of my brain and thoughts. It is affectionately referred to as ‘Mark mouth’, from my days on stage when I would mumble my lines and the director would yell at me, again, to E-NUN-CIATE!! Sure enough, the beast reared its ugly head at the wrong time.

What I MEANT to say as I was wrapping up the toast, talking about the life they have in front of them, was… ‘it’s going to be a great ride.’

What came out of my mouth was… ‘SHE’S going to be a great ride.’

Classy! Suave! Smooth! Yeah, that’s me!!

Fortunately, I was on the back side of the toast, bringing it in for a landing, TOTALLY oblivious to my (some would say ‘Freudian’) slip, so what laughter there was I didn’t hear (I also knew the cutting of the cake was next, so I’m sure my mind was drifting to getting some to eat….hmmmmm, wedding cake…). Anyway, I said, ‘to Reese and Melanie’, we all toasted and went on.

As I’m moving toward the cake area, my best friend, Brian, quickly calls me to his table. When I sat down, he said, with a big smile on his face, ‘Did you REALLY mean to say ‘SHE’S going to be a great ride?’ I paused, started wondering what he was talking about, looked at the other side of the table where two other friends, Kathy and Cindy, were vigorously nodding their heads and laughing…then my eyes started growing wide! “I SAID that?” Yes, I was assured, I did say that. And it was on video tape. For EVERYONE (including my future grandchildren) to hear!!

GENIOUS!! Unintentional comedy OFF the scale!! Thank you! I’ll be here all night!

So, in light of needing to re-phrase my toast, and in celebration of their ONE YEAR anniversary…let me ask your indulgence as I say what I should have said back then.

“I remember the first time I met Reese, about 18 or 19 years ago. He was not a happy guy. Not having a good day. He was crying, cold, wet….naked. People roughing him up, moving him from here to there…just not a good time. But I saw something special in this kid...something I could build on. So I took him under my wing…helped him grow, molded him, shaped him…you could almost say I was a ‘father figure’ to him. Almost!
Seriously, it’s incredible to me and your mom that we are here watching you start this next chapter in your life. It may have seemed slow to you, but to us it’s gone by so fast!
Following Sarah’s lead about Melanie’s old boyfriends, I’ll say we do remember all your old girlfriends…some we liked, very nice girls. The others…eh, not so much. I remember the first time you had a girl sleep over at our house…when you both were about five! It was quite the scandal in our church then! (She was at the reception, by the way, so I’m sure that would have made her blush. And, Laura Lynn, don’t worry, I would only have pointed in your general direction!) Girlfriends came and went, but when you started dating Melanie, there was something different. I remember asking you, ‘What do you see in her?’ And not in a sarcastic way, but I was really curious. And you said, ‘Dad, she makes me laugh’.
That’s good, son. Laughter is great, especially as the years go by. I used to make your mom laugh at funny things I would say or do…now she just laughs at me when I’m NOT trying to be funny, but she’s still laughing. I hope you guys can keep that.
Melanie, you are now the new number one in Reese’s life, after God of course. It’s a title that Noelle and I willingly and with excitement give to you, because we know you are worthy of it. We also give over to you his personality, his goofiness, his desire to play video games ALL THE TIME, his moods, his laundry…it’s all your, honey! Let me know how it works for ya!! Seriously, we couldn’t be happier for him and you…welcome to our family!
You’re both starting what I believer to be an incredible life, your future looks very bright and I believe God’s got great things in store for the two of you. I can tell you both have a deep, caring love for each other. You’re starting very young, some would say, but that’s good in that as you continue to grow your personal ‘roots’ in life, they will intertwine with the others, and your bond to each other will be that much stronger!
IT’S GOING TO BE A GREAT RIDE, this life of yours, and I can’t wait to see where it takes you. I love you both! I pray God’s blessings on you.
To Reese and Melanie!”

Happy anniversary, kids! Hope the ride continues to be fun and exciting!

Birthday Extravaganza!

This April we have had another milestone extravaganza with our children’s birthdays. Reese turned 20 on the 3rd, McKenna turned 16 on the 18th and Drake will be 13 on the 25th. Wow…how did the time pass so quickly!?

Oddly, Reese’s turning 20 bothered me a bit more than him getting married last summer. I’m not sure why this is so. You would think that becoming a mother-in-law would be the thing that makes me feel old! When I think about the last 20 years I have a lot of wonderful memories and some that aren’t so great. Oh how I wish I could go back and correct MY behavior as Reese was growing up. It’s sad to say that I didn’t always respond to him in the right way. I didn’t always discipline in the right way. I didn’t always spend the time I needed to with him. I didn’t always give him my undivided attention when he deserved it. I didn’t always say the right things. I DID always love him. Always. Even when I didn’t like him very much and he didn’t like me very much…I always loved him. And I still do! I am so proud to be his Mom. He’s turned into a great person who knows how to love others, desires to serve God and wants to make a difference in the world. Wow…what a gift he is!

With McKenna’s birthday came a driver’s license. Yay! And not so ‘yay’. It will be nice to be able to have someone to run an errand for me every now and then (until she gets tired of that!) and to help chauffer her brother around. The insurance…not so great! McKenna is my only girl…and I am so glad that I have her! Oh how I wish I could go back and correct MY behavior over the last 16 years. It’s sad to say that in addition to the ‘didn’ts’ listed above I wasn’t always compassionate. I wasn’t always understanding. I wasn’t always a good listener when she needed to talk. I wasn’t always available. I wasn’t always kind. I WAS always in love with her. Always. Even when I didn’t like her very much and she didn’t like me very much…I was always in love with her. And still am! She’s my girl! I am very proud to be her Mom. She is growing into a beautiful young woman inside and out who is learning how to please God and desires that in her life. She cares about others and is there for her friends no matter what. Wow…what a gift she is!

Drake…I can’t believe he is entering into the teen-age years. Goodness. My baby…13! Yikes! Now that makes me feel old! Drake has always been so shy (until you get to know him!). I know he’s growing up because he’s starting to leave that behind. I can see him making better choices already. Oh how I wish I could go back and correct MY behavior during Drake’s first 13 years. It’s sad to say that in addition to all of the ‘didn’ts’ and wasn’ts’ listed above I haven’t always been patient enough. I haven’t always tried to see it from his perspective. I haven’t always kept my word. I haven’t always loved unconditionally. I haven’t always led by example. I HAVE always loved him. Always. Even when I didn’t like him very much and he didn’t like me very much…I have always loved him. And still do! He brings me joy! I am so proud to be his Mom! He is growing into a great young man who is loyal and loving towards others, can make you laugh and lift you up and is learning to serve God and please Him. Wow…what a gift he is!

Oh how I love these children of mine! Always have. Always will.

HARSH!

Most of my life I have prided myself on being like the Range, from the song 'Home on the Range'...where seldom is heard, a discouraging word.' (I'd change the next part about the sky to INCLUDE clouds and a chance of strong storms and hail and tornadoes and blizzards all the time...it's the weather freak in me...).

But as I've grown older and crankier and grumpier, I've found that's not as much the 'norm' as it used to be. Discouraging words DO come out at times, more often I DO make statements and arguments that are very...argumentative. I do things that cause hurt feelings, bitterness and anger. The unfortunate recipients of most of theses outbursts are my family, in general, and specifically, my wife, Noelle.

When I speak harsh, angry...'discouraging' words to her, I'm definitely NOT following the command of Colossians 3:19 which says 'Husbands, love your wives and never treat them harshly." Along that line, verse 21 instructs the fathers not to 'provoke your children to anger, so they won't be discouraged.'

Anger, discouragement, bitterness...all coming FROM the husband/father. Who, obviously, is more prone to DO that sort of thing. I notice that command is not given to the wife (hardly seems fair!). Probably some testosterone/competitive/'me-Tarzan-you-Jane' thing that's inbred in guys for...Lord only knows what reason.

Probably as a guy this instruction would sink in more if I would take it like a player hearing it from a coach I respect (in this case, God). He keeps drilling it into me over and over during practice! It's put on signs around the locker room to remind me what my focus needs to be. THAT'S what I need! A sign! I can make one and nail it over the door in our bedroom and slap it every time I walk out, like a football team slaps it's motto sign before they head out of the big game...'Never treat her harshly!'. Practice it, learn it, live it! (nailing a sign inside our bedroom over the door would probably make her bitter all over again, and the only slapping would be...well...I'll just imagine it's there!)

1 Peter 3:7 tells men to give honor to their wives as a weaker vessel. I heard a great illustration about the difference between men and women...

Men are like a tin cup you'd take camping. You can drop it, kick it, throw it into the backpack without thinking about it. It might get dinged up and not be as shiny or clean (just like a lot of guys!), but...it doesn't care...it's a tin cup. It still works.

Women are more like a porcelain teacup. It (they) must be treated with more care and carefulness. Tenderness and gentleness are the ways to take care of such an item. You can't throw it around or casually drop it without it cracking or breaking. It's a more delicate item. That sort of cup needs and wants to be clean and shiny (just like most women) when you use it.

My point is this...when men live with their wife, they are asked to grow. It's apparently part of our DNA to treat others in harsh ways sometimes (probably more often than we think). We grow by learning how to treat a TOTALLY different kind of person in ways that are almost foreign to us. God likes growth, stretching...taking us out of our comfort zones. Making us into the men He wants us to be. He says we can do ALL things through Him who gives us strength.

Maybe THAT needs to be the sign we have up in our rooms!

Ever been asleep, DEEPLY asleep, and then you were jolted awake by something that happened to you? Physically happened…out of the blue, obviously unexpected (you were asleep; what could be expected other than…nothing?), and completely out of the ordinary?
That happened last night, and I don’t believe even the person who woke me up knew what she was doing. Yes, I’m talking about Noelle, my beautiful wife.
Sometime after 3 this morning (I know that because I glanced at the clock just after it happened), the pillow I was laying on was suddenly JERKED from under my head, bringing me to full awake status in a moment’s time. Noelle had, for some reason, ripped it right out from me, not unlike someone ripping a tablecloth from under a full set of dishes and leaving them all intact. My head didn’t whip around or my body fall off the bed, it was that quick.
My first thought was that she had had enough. I had either been snoring or tossing too much and she was throwing my pillow off the bed and would demand that I follow it…to the couch, the front room…wherever, just out of the bedroom!
As I was waiting for some words to come forth out of the dark, my eyes adjusted to the low light and I noticed her wrapping her arm around the pillow, clutching it for…comfort, maybe?
How sweet! My wife wanted to snuggle with her husband’s pillow and think longingly of him and…EEEHHHHHH!!!! Wrong!
Noelle sleeps with a body pillow on occasion, and it was then I realized she was still asleep but her subconscious was looking for the big pillow and instead grabbed mine. At least that’s the story I’m sticking with, because the snoring or tossing (or even the argument we had earlier this week) might STILL have been her reasoning for violently waking me up, but…
After sitting up and waiting a few seconds to see if she said anything, I chuckled and reached to the floor to get another pillow for her to have (Yes, I had to have mine back. You silly people. It’s shape and size are the way I like a pillow to be…thin, not fluffy. Come on, I need my pillow back!).
I said, ‘Honey, here’s a pillow. You took mine’. She went, ‘huh?’, opened her arm for me to exchange the pillows, and went back to sleep…I guess. She probably started calling me names in her head for waking her up…thinking I need to be on the couch or the front room, etc.
Never a dull moment….

How Do I Explain McKenna?

This past fall McKenna was part of the color guard, the flag waving corps that accompanies the marching band at halftimes of games and at contests. She was a natural at tossing and catching the flag, improving and impressing with every practice.
For the first home game, we had arrived early with her, so they and the band could go over last minute instructions and get in the stands before most of the crowd showed up. I was on the track in front of the stands talking with another band parent before our night of helping them set up their halftime show when TJ, the color guard instructor, came up to me and said, “Mr. Massey, can I ask you a question?”
Now, TJ is a big black man, very funny but demanding with the guard, so I thought it a wise choice to give him my full attention.

“Yes sir?,” I said.

“Can you explain that to me?,” he asked, and pointed into the stands where the guard was.

As I looked, I saw all but one of them were sitting down, organizing their stuff, talking with each other, looking around the field, listening to their ipods…just passing time. The one who wasn’t sitting was…McKenna. She was standing about two or three rows up into the group, facing right, and doing the running man dance.

There wasn’t any music playing.

She was dancing alone.

She didn’t care.

Explain that? Explain to someone, who has only known my daughter for a few months and really only from a few hours a day of doing flag throwing drills, what has to be going through her head at that moment?
I might as well explain the pull of the ocean toward the moon that causes the tides to come in and out, the cocooning and emerging process of butterflies, the instinctual return of salmon to their birthing place to spawn.

How do I explain this girl who, around age 5, was in a deep, philosophical argument with her older brother in the car one day regarding who farted. She had smelled the offending odor, and mentioned it, but of course Reese shot back with the tried and true, ‘You smelt it, you dealt it!’ McKenna would have none of that, as she emphatically replied, ‘No, I didn’t!’ Reese began repeating, ‘You smelt it, you dealt it! You smelt it, you dealt it!’, followed by her ever louder responses, ‘NO I DIDN’T!!’. Finally, in a desperate and bold verbal hail mary, McKenna retorted, ‘REESE, I SMELT IT BUT DIDN’T DEALT IT!!’

How do I communicate what I feel about the picture of the two year old she was at the time as she’s holding a flex-tube at the Omniplex in Oklahoma City and it’s shooting air in her face and her hair is standing up on end and she’s laughing and thinking this is the greatest thing in the world?

How do I explain where, or how, she and a friend came up with a new holiday…Turkey-Bacon Day’? They apparently decided that Turkey-Bacon needed to be celebrated and have instituted their own holiday for this healthy version of a breakfast staple. They put the announcement on Facebook, inviting others to join them in creating a festival atmosphere celebrating the genius of turkey-bacon. McKenna even made her own shirt wishing all who looked at her a ‘Happy Turkey-Bacon Day.’ They’ve even made a catch-phrase…’It’s goinkin’ (I guess a cross between gobble-gobble and oink)! And she doesn’t care what people think! A wonderful trait, but once again, how do I explain this?

How do I explain the young lady that loves to play with the neighborhood girls who come to our door to ask her to come outside and brighten their afternoon with her presence? Or likes to create bright, colorful drawings on any piece of paper she can find that expresses her delight with her friends or family…or a cow she made up who’s name is Tony?

How do I explain the thought process of this female?

Once, when she reached the end of her rope at finding, AGAIN, her younger brother’s underwear in the bathroom floor after he got out of the shower, she proceeded to tape it and a note to his door informing him that the next time she finds them there she would ‘HANG THEM IN THE TREE IN THE FRONT YARD!! Love, McKenna’! (She did follow through on that threat by the way…NOT a beautiful day in the neighborhood!). How do I begin to explain this?

How do I explain the girl that loves to give me hugs and kisses when we’re just hanging at the house…or wants to practice driving the car with me anywhere we can in anticipation of getting her permit (which I’M not quite ready for, btw!)…or wants to practice our wedding reception ‘daddy-daughter’ dance to Steven Curtis Chapman’s ‘I Danced With Cinderella’ at totally random moments? She’s a teenager who likes to spend time with her father? What brand of foolishness is she displaying here?

You want me to explain the girl that is so passionate about her friends that not long after having arguments or disagreements she’s on the phone or otherwise communicating with them, trying to work things out in order to get the relationship back to a happy state?

She is who she is because God has put it in her heart to be the free spirit, loud and proud, outlandish, marches-to-her-own-drummer type of girl that she is.

I looked at her in the stands that evening, smiled, then looked at TJ and shrugged my shoulders. “I dunno! You have to ask God, I guess. He made her that way.”
Which is just how I like it!

Dork

What is it about family events or seeing relatives you rarely see that brings out the ‘dork’ in you? You know, trying to act cool or say the right thing and you wind up looking like something out of the zoo and getting ‘gratuitous’ laughter? Or…maybe it’s just me?
I was at my wife’s cousin’s wedding rehearsal the other day and seeing people I hadn’t seen in a long time, making idle chit chat. At one point I found myself in the food line with my daughter, McKenna, and the bride and groom walk up behind us to get in line. Now, I’ve known Thad, my wife’s cousin, since he was a little kid, visiting him every couple of years in California . He’s just graduated from college (as had his fiancé) and they were all aglow in pre-marital bliss, getting ready for the big next day. After the initial how’s things going stuff, I start to ask questions like ‘So, you excited?’, ‘You really like her, I guess?’ ‘She a nice girl?’ (both asked as she was turned away talking to someone else, thank God!), and this one, ‘So…you excited?’ Yes, AGAIN!! Lulls in conversation can be painful for me…so painful that I have to make others suffer by MAKING AN OBVIOUS STATEMENT IN THE FORM OF A QUESTION...TWICE, APPARENTLY!!! I’m surprised I didn’t really get spooked and ask if they were looking forward to having sex!! Somebody TAKE ME BACK TO THE CAR…please!
McKenna was standing with me and, thankfully, she has inherited her mother’s gift of giving me the courtesy laugh at my mostly lame attempt at humor in front of others. Or…she was caught up in all the wedding ‘giddiness' that teen girls sometimes find themselves in and was looking at me as the handsome and rugged daddy who will be there for her as she walks down the aisle and dances with her at a probably insanely overpriced reception…nah, it was probably the courtesy laugh, while thinking, ‘geez, what a dork my dad is. But I love the old guy, so I’ll try to make his embarrassment feel less tortuous.’
Am I alone in this? Am I the ONLY guy who can’t believe what he just asked or said and gives himself a mental stab in the EYE for even opening his mouth? Surely, there are others out there…and no, I’m not calling you ‘Shirley’!

Year End Wrap Up and Christmas Greetings

Listen my friends, and you will hear
Of the Massey’s life in 2008…oh,what a year!

From marching bands to the Air Force to beaches and travel
It was all we could do not to completely unravel!

There were birthdays, anniversaries, and a big graduation
We all ran the gamut from happy to frustration!

There’s five in our house, plus Mark’s mom, in case you don’t know
And we’ll start with January in Texas…and, as usual, there’s no snow!

After a visit from Noelle’s …’different’ cousin Andrew
Reese and dad’s car took a spin in the morning dew!

He rolled it two times and landed on his head
But God protected His child, and he spent only a few hours in the hospital bed!

February came and Mark turned 43
He’s doing quite well for his age…but bifocals are in his future, ‘cause it’s harder to see!

The month came and went with no ripples in that pool
But wait! I forgot…Reese finished early! He was done with high school!

March blew in and before our very eyes
Drake decided it was time that he should be baptized!

He’s generally a shy boy, attention he’s always resistin’
But he knew he had to let others know that he was a Christian!

When April showed up, that’s when we got very busy
Three birthdays in one month can really make you dizzy!

Reese turned 18, McKenna turned 14, and Drake became 11 this year
All three are generally good kids… so we have little to fear!

But wait, that’s not all…oh, no that would be too easy
Getting braces off and proms and color guard auditions… It all made us quite queasy!

Color guard? Oh, yeah…that was McKenna’s direction
She could toss and catch the flags with ease...it was a natural progression!

As we headed into May, this shock came to husband and wife
Each of the kids was moving on to another level of life!

Leaving middle school and elementary! Graduating from high school now!
Growing up before our very eyes! We both could only think….’wow’

Summer showed up and life was speeding on
But did someone say ‘vacation in Florida?’ In mid-June we were gone!

The whole family went to Destin, Mark’s sis and bro, too
One last fling with Reese before he went off to the Wild Blue!

The white sandy beaches were really quite cool
But there were jellyfish in the water! We should’ve stayed in a pool!

We had to come back to the life that is too real
McKenna started color guard practice…it was a back-to-school feel!

At the end of July, there was happiness and remorse
It was time for Reese to spread his wings…and leave for the Air Force!

To San Antonio he went for Basic Military Training
We prayed and God gave strength… his determination was never waning!

As the summer closed out, all we heard was ‘band, band, band’
Both McKenna and Drake were in…so we had to give a hand!

For McKenna we joined booster club, Drake got mom’s old clarinet
Before we knew it, band fund raising deals were up to our neck!

But…before school started we had to say our goodbyes
To our best friends, the Means’…there were tears in our eyes!

They’re in Colorado now; God has given them great grace
We talk with them often…but miss seeing them face to face!

Anyway…School, work, and practices became the routine
For the lives of the adults, the freshman, and the pre-teen!

In September we jumped in cars and to San Antonio we would race
To see Reese graduate from Basic Training at Lackland Air Force Base!

After six weeks he looked great, a handsome sight to see
But the next step took him to tech school at Keesler Air Base down in Biloxi!

We all came back to Sachse and like an hourglass full of sand
We were poured from Friday night football to contests for the local high school band!

The first weekend of October, McKenna had her first homecoming dance
While Mark, Noelle and Drake went to Biloxi…where Reese was…caught in a trance?

He wanted to marry Melanie, his longtime girlfriend
She was the light of his eye, and a life without her he didn’t want to spend!

We were happy for Reese! But then we left Biloxi and that gave us the blues
However we got over it real quick, ‘cause Mark and Noelle went on a cruise!

We drove down to Houston with the Means, Humes and Moore’s
To embark on the Ecstasy, and sail to Mexican shores!

We had a great time, and I’d really like to gloat
But as it is in Vegas, everything stays on the boat!

When we got back on land, one more contest was brewin’
For the Sachse High band…but the end would leave them stewin’!

They came close to state finals, just one place away
But it wasn’t in the cards, and they’d have to try another day!

In the middle of November, Reese got transferred to Wichita Falls
Sheppard Air Base is where he’ll finish school…so close he can make house calls!

Now Thanksgiving has come and gone, and we were all together
In Oklahoma with Noelle’s family, having a great time in the cold weather!

December is upon us now, everyone’s got things to do
But we always remember the One who first loved us and gave His life for us, too!

As you celebrate this Christmas, wrapping up boxes and tin
Don’t forget the real reason for the season…and Come, let us adore Him!

As we all know, this life can be like an out of control gurney
So our hope and wish is that you’ll just laugh…and together, enjoy the journey!

Merry Christmas! Happy New Year!
The Massey’s!

Catching Up

So much has happened since our last post. I've been on my husband to post something new and he is working on it but thought I would catch us up...

After graduation we took the family to Destin, Florida for vacation. Our last family vacation with Reese in the house under our household umbrella. We had a great week together and faced some interesting challenges while there. Being raised on the west coast with waves you can surf and water you can't see through I found it a bit boring but relaxing and thought that the 'beautiful crystal clear water' that everyone talks about wasn't so great...you can see what's floating in there! I would rather be oblivious. Mark and I had booked a catamaran cruise for our family and were looking forward to it with the kids. We were promised dolphin sightings and snorkeling and beach time but were stuck on the boat for three hours in the hot, hot sun because the jelly fish were so thick and the captain didn't want to let us into the water. Sigh...we'll talk about that memory forever! Not the least of the things that went wrong was that I brought home sand mites and broke out in small bumps all up and down my arms. What!?!?! Sand mites?!?!? I have never heard of such a thing!

With all of that said, here's what went right. We spent a good amount of time in the car together as we always do when we travel. The kids played games and joked around and chatted. They always seem to get along better when we travel. I love to listen to them laugh! Such a wonderful sound. We had a wonderful day at the beach with Mark's sister, Helen and her girls, Abbey and Summer and with Mark's brother, Matt. We played volleyball on the beach. We learned that the smaller the jelly fish the smaller the sting (but still a sting!). We built sand castles with motes. We buried Mark in the sand. Mark and Reese got to eat very fresh seafood. I read on the beach with my feet in the warm sand. We ate dinner on a covered patio at the beach while it stormed all around us (Mark was a very happy man!) We talked, we laughed we relaxed (as ordered by Reese who is tired of vacations that make him tired! Thank you, Reese, for demanding us to slow down). And, true to form, Mark always has a stop planned for our trip home so we can see a little something extra. This time, New Orleans. We stopped and had Beignets at Cafe' Du Monde. YUM!

After we returned from our vacation we busied ourselves getting Reese ready to leave for basic training. On July 28th we dropped him off and said good-bye for 6 whole weeks! The house is quiet without him...well, I should say, quiet-ER...not quiet. After a long six weeks we finally made our trip to San Antonio to his graduation from basic training. He is now an Airman in the United States Aif Force and is completling his technical training in Wichita Falls after 7 weeks in Biloxi Mississippi. We are so glad he is going to be in Texas for a while! He is close enough to home that he can come and visit on the weekends! We are so very proud of him!

School started in August and we were off! Drake decided to join the band and he is learning how to play the clarinet. He's enjoying middle school and is doing very well. McKenna started her year in the thick of football season by way of the marching band. She is a proud member of the Sachse Mustang Marching Band's Colorguard. We have spent the last few months doing new and exciting things as band parents! Football halftime shows, marching contests and band booster club! I'll have to see if I can post their show...it's great and she's great! I think she's found a niche! We are looking forward to next year!

Another major announcement in our lives is that Reese is getting married! He and Melanie have set a date for June 20, 2009. Our lives have quickly been taken over by wedding plans. I am thankful that Reese has found Melanie. She is a wonderful young woman who loves God and loves Reese. I see it in her eyes everytime she looks at him or mentions his name. I can't thank God enough for her. Reese will be loved very well for the rest of his life.

Stay tuned for more of Mark's posts. We'll try not to leave so much time between...with so much going on I'm sure we'll have much to fill you in on!